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​When your dogs expectations don't match reality, it can cause countless problems with performance - especially in competition. But routines can help — Megan tells us how.

Chrissi joins me to talk about the winter blues, and how we can overcome them (and our busy to do lists) to find time to train our dogs in the bits and pieces of time we have each day.

Incompatible behaviors are things that our dogs do that are incompatible with other behaviors; both cannot happen at the same time. Here are some examples:

Lying down is incompatible with jumping up – they cannot both be happening at the same time.

Pulling on a leash is incompatible with looking at the handler.

A toy in a dog's mouth is incompatible with mouthing, biting or nipping.

Often the simplest way to manage a dog's behavior is by thinking carefully about what the dog is doing and then ask ourselves – is there something that our dogs already know that is incompatible with what we don't like?

If you don't want your dog to jump up on people, ask the dog to do something that is incompatible with the behavior that you don't like. It may not train the dog, but it will get you through that moment in time.

Not much time to train? Focus on these 2 behaviors.

If a person has incredibly limited training time and not a lot of desire to train their dog, I'm going to suggest two key behaviors that will keep most dogs out of big trouble, most of the time. Put all of your energy into making these behaviors bombproof, and you'll save yourself a lot of grief.

Teach your dog "Come" and "stay."

Come! If a dog is coming towards you, they are not jumping on another person.They are not digging in your neighbor's garden and they are not getting hit by a car. Hard to beat all of that.

Stay! I don't care how or where your dog stays – sit, down, stay on a mat, or a combination the three; all of these work just fine.If your dog can stay put, then you have something to do with your dog after they come to you. Now you can open your front door to bring in your groceries, keep your dogs from bothering people, or hold them in one place and eliminate running through the house at inopportune times.

That's it. With those two behaviors, life will be much easier. So train them vigilantly. Be generous with the cookies and the praise. Spend a few minutes each week putting these skills to the test under distraction. And have a reasonably happy life with your dog – at least at home.

A Dog Trainer vs. A Minimalist

Yes, there are plenty of other behaviors that come in handy too, and since I'm a dog trainer, I happen to enjoy training many of them.

But if I'm talking to a a person who only wants to get along with minimal effort; consider starting with those two: come and stay.

1. Persistence: Mindful trainers are willing to try, try again. They know that there will be more runs, more days, and the slow and steady approach wins. They understand that frustration is part of the learning curve and don't threaten to quit after every mistake. They don't make excuses; they don't blame others. They carry on. They live in the present experience without wallowing in the past or dreaming of the future. What is happening today is the focus of their attention even as they build for the big picture.

We talk about the process of self-evaluation when it comes to dog training, Denise's latest realizations around engagement, and how she's adapted what she shares.

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I have been teaching handling to obedience students for a long time. Some students have no issue incorporating and even changing their handling to use specific footwork. But most students have a lot of trouble keeping their footwork consistent.

It might be easier without the dog and without a judge calling the heeling pattern. But insert the dog or the judge into the picture and you can get a stressed and paralyzed handler that get tied up into foot placement thoughts when there is a lot more handling to think about. These handlers worked many days, weeks, months, and some had worked years perfecting the footwork without the dog.

Why does this happen?

E142: Nancy Gagliardi Little - The Handler's Role in Heelwork

As dog trainers and handlers, we are bound to be critiqued. It can be by your teacher or, more importantly, by a judge at a competition.

If you are in the business of dog training, as perfect as you strive to be, you'll eventually get a student that didn't like your services. Maybe they had a rough day and were already trigger-stacked. Maybe you didn't find a way to connect with them. Maybe they simply didn't like your style.

All of these things are normal, and it's important not to take them too personally.

Easier said than done, right?!

I have to admit, I have a hard time taking criticism. I'm not the best at it. It's a constant struggle for me, because I subconsciously don't allow myself to fall short. I'm sure a lot of you can relate. We've all had difficulties with criticism at some point. No one wants to let the others down.

However, that doesn't mean I don't try as hard as I can to improve how I respond to criticism.

Critics are hard, but remember that both our pride and our need to explain can get in the way of learning how to be a better version of ourselves when someone points out our shortcomings (in a delicate or not-so-delicate manner).

So how can you take criticism the "right way"?

It's fun to start new behaviors - but often we get distracted (or frustrated!) and never take those behaviors through to completion. Julie and I talk about how to avoid that problem and how to actually reach those long-held training goals.

In last week's blog post I introduced the idea of dog to child interactions – how to get the pair in the same space! Now let's look at what to do when the dog and child are interacting.

Dogs generally don't appreciate having anyone reach over them to pet the top of their heads. Instead, teach the child to pet the dog's chest, shoulders or side of the neck. If the dog is barely looking at the child's face and is just thrilled to be there with a happy, wagging body, then all is well and it isn't likely to matter what the child pets.

Julie Daniels and I chat about her upcoming When to Go workshop, and how she gets beautiful startline stays... and the difference between the type of stay she teaches and the one Denise and Shade discussed last week!

In recent days, I have had conversations with a few friends who seemed to be all saying the same thing – "My dog and I just don't seem to be having quite as much fun anymore."

These are great trainers, who adore their dogs, and have always had great relationships with them! Bitten by the dog sports bug, they have been very committed to growing their own knowledge and taking extra classes, going to private trainers – having fun doing All The Things!

Only now…..there is this.

Years ago, I learned from Madeline Gabriel that children should be instructed to ask THE DOG for permission to visit. How clever is that? Yes, we all know about asking the dog's owner, but what about the dog??!! I'm sure each person has a different way of doing it, but here's how I have the child ask the dog:

Child stands or sits still, and calls to the dog. "Brito, do you want to be petted?" The child can bend over, pat their legs, make "pup pup pup!" sounds, etc.

We're back with the second half of my interview withDenise and Shade about the state of positive training in the sports world today, the skills they feel dogs are missing that they need most in seminars and competition, and what people tend to overlook when training a sports dog.

So often we throw around the word, "foundations." In fact, when you hear people give advice it usually sounds something like "Just go back to foundations." Often, the advice is well intended, but it lacks substance.

The issue is that the word "foundations" is a buzzword.

Denise and Shade come on the podcast to talk about the state of positive training in the sports world today, the skills they feel dogs are missing that they need most in seminars and competition, and what people tend to overlook when training a sports dog.

I've been teaching agility seminars since the early 1990s. Back then, when I was young, R+ training was not commonly used, even in agility training, and it felt like an uphill battle. I used to be quite the zealot in my seminars. I was passionate in my presentation of dog's choice training. Passionate about my beliefs, my viewpoint and the way I choose to train. While I remember loving the job, it must have been difficult sometimes for the attendees to really hear my message through all that opinionated zeal. There's a lot of pressure from passion. It's hard to learn new stuff under pressure. I have a more empathetic approach now. I learned the hard way to practice inspiration rather than coerce others to train my way.

NY Times Best-selling author Cat Warren joins me to talk about her cadaver dog, Solo, and what she learned while writing a book about their life together.

It's not easy to navigate a rally course while staying connected to your dog. Many dogs need a lot of connection from their handlers, and if we don't give it to them they will often disconnect and their attention will wander. When there are a whole bunch of distractions nearby, we don't want our dogs disconnecting!

I've put together a few tips for saying connected to your dog while navigating a Rally course.